It's with a heavy heart that I write this tonight. I received a call this afternoon from Bill's sister that her husband passed away this afternoon. He had been holding his own with COVID , but went into cardiac arrest this afternoon. They were able to bring him back once, but not a second time.

Shirley is holding it together. I feel so bad for her having to deal with another loss so soon after losing her brother. And I would really like to be packing a suitcase and heading to Florida to be with her, but I know that it isn't safe for me to do that. She understands that, but we need the sister time together.

Her daughter lives nearby, but all of Don's sons live in New England. Most of them have small children, with 1 just born in March. So, they aren't able to come now either. Don's sister lives in Tennessee and, because of age and the virus, also isn't able to travel. But, my heart is with her.

We did decide that Don is at the organ, Bill has his trumpet, and Shirley and Don's daughter Kim has her violin and Bill's mother is getting quite a concert tonight. We were both going to have a glass of wine and toast Don, and I know I did it.

So, this is short, the news is not good, but that's all I have right now. I've been doing well. I still can't schedule Bill's burial, so he's hanging out on the mantle! The girls, McKenna and Kiyann, have decided that we don't have to take his urn out to eat on Monday morning for their birthday breakfast. We were going to have a picnic at the cemetery, but since we can't do that, we're going to do what we normally did. Kayden is going to come this time. He has missed his last 2 breakfasts because Bill was in the hospital. Brianna hasn't had one in a couple of years either and she'll be working Monday.

Keep us in your prayers, especially Shirley. She's really kind of lost right now...and I know the feeling. 

It has been an exhausting and emotional 3 days. Family members started arriving Thursday evening with the majority of them coming in on Friday. While I was waiting for people to come, I met Kayden and Joe at the church and we figured out the video camera and the sound system. The camera did well enough with the sound that I didn't need to buy the external microphone. But, live and learn.

I got Bill's Presidential Citation Thursday, and even though in big blue letters it says "DO NOT BEND" on the front and back, yep, you guessed it, our carrier folded it to stick in in the mail slot! Why she didn't just stand it on top, or lay it on the step, or put it between the doors is beyond me, but the citation is ruined. There is a form that can be faxed to get a replacement and Emily is going to do that tomorrow and have the new one sent to her office, but I'm taking this one to the Post Office tomorrow to show the postmaster. It probably won't do any good, but it will make me feel better!

I had a good visit with my sister and brother Friday evening, along with a niece and her friend. Brooke managed to cut my hair and then Larry and Ronna and I went to dinner together. Since they were leaving right after the dinner on Saturday, I told the kids that we would visit after the service, that I really wanted to just visit with my family Friday night, and that was agreeable to all of them.

The service on Saturday was all I could have wanted it to be and I think Bill would have been pleased. He had always told me that he didn't care about his service other than he wanted a military funeral because he wouldn't be there! But, since his ashes still can't be buried, as the pastor put it, "Bill's with us today".

It was mostly family, but when you consider there were 39 family members there, that almost filled half of the church. A former co-worker of Bill's was there, he just happened to learn of the service from the pastor at his church last Sunday. And my best friend said she ran every stop sign to get there, but she made it. The church did a lovely dinner and I don't think there were many leftovers. 

The Illinois family got on the road, others went home/hotels to change clothes and then most came to the house. We looked through old pictures and listened to the kids play. It was so hot they couldn't go outside to play. I was really glad that the cats were at the vet for the week-end, but I miss them now that everyone is gone.

I was totally exhausted by the time everyone left and was falling asleep in my chair, but when I went to bed I couldn't sleep. But, I did sleep in this morning and have felt rested and at peace all day. I know that I did the best that I could for Bill.

As far as his sister and her husband, Don is slightly improving. They are waiting for plasma and the drug they are using to arrive. All Shirley could tell me about that today is that it is in Florida now. They have been taking Don off the bi-pap periodically to see if they can get him to drink some. She also said he is getting agitated when they move him, which is a good sign, and his kidney function is improving. So, the prayers have been heard and answered.

I'm attaching several pictures from this last week, from when Bill came home from his sleep-over and the service. I'm not going to try to caption all of them (still haven't figured that out yet), but they are pretty self-explanatory!

 I have a new plan for this blog now that Bill's journey is almost complete. I want to keep writing, so I working on a new format. There may not be any posts for a bit, or I may get it switched over pretty quick. I wanted to wait until yesterday was over. So, stay tuned!

Just a short post for tonight.

As we prepare to say good-bye to Bill tomorrow, I want to ask all of you to pray not only for me and the kids and grandkids, but for his sister and her husband. Don is hospitalized in Florida with COVID-19 and this evening was moved to ICU. He's not on a ventilator...yet, but is on a bi-pap machine. Shirley is so worried, especially since she can't be with him, and she has also been tested, but doesn't have any results yet. She's just been self-quarantined.

I will do a longer post about the service sometime Sunday after all the family has gone back home. Just remember to keep us all in prayer, especially Don and Shirley Hand.

Here it is, July 4th already! After the days being the same for so long, time is really moving along now, or so it seems. In my neighborhood last night, you would think that it was the 4th. A nd, people don't know how to shoot fireworks! They are buying the aerial ones and putting them in the middle of the street. Those did make it into the air. Then, I suspect with alcohol giving a helping hand, they just started lighting them and throwing them...at cars and houses and in neighboring yards. They were far enough from me that I was safe, but a couple of them came pretty close. After that barrage stopped, a car took off quickly from there and I suspect they were after more fireworks. But, I went to sleep and don't remember hearing anymore. So, tonight should be interesting. Mouse did not like the sounds. He didn't mind the thunder we had, but he did not like the fireworks. 

I finally have my door hung! Ryan, Joe and Kayden came yesterday and got it hung. They are going to come back next week, it may just be Joe and Kayden, and start to get the siding back on. I didn't want them working today because I know that Joe and Mistie are having a cookout and Ryan and Amanda are packing to move closer to his farm job. Kiyann helped me in the house yesterday and is coming back this coming week to make sure everything is ready for next week-end. I imagine people are going to all be arriving on Friday, with a couple coming on Thursday. It seems like my to-do list of things that must be done before next week-end just keeps getting longer and longer.

I went to the dr. this week. I had an area of welts come up, on my upper chest. I thought that maybe a spider had gotten into bed with me, or a skeeter and had a nice meal. But, after 4 days of intense itching, and then smaller spots appearing on the backs of my hands, I decided I'd better get it checked out. What we do know is we don't know what it is. It isn't shingles as it crossed the midline. They only appear on one side or the other. The nurse practitioner thinks it might be poison ivy, but there are no pustules. And the ones on my hands only go to just past my wrist bone and have started to migrate to the underside of my arm and the pad of my thumb. I've also noticed that the knuckle on my right index finger at my hand is swollen and sore, as is my right big toe, which hadn't hurt for months, and my right hip, not down my leg, just my hip. After doing some research online, and I know, that can be very dangerous, I do believe it is a flare of psoriasis brought on by a flare of psoriatic arthritis. Now, I've not been diagnosed with psoriatic arthritis, but I have brought it up to the dr. several times and just get poo-pooed. But, I have every symptom listed for it. It has probably been brought on by the stress of getting things ready for the memorial next week. I would think that the stress of the 6 months Bill was in the hospital would have brought on the stress hives, but I didn't have a single spot. I haven't felt especially stressed but Bill's daughter suggested that it was subconsiously acknowledging that this was one of the last things I could do for Bill. And maybe that's true. Anyway, I got some hydrocortisone cream and some hydroxyzine pills since I'm not supposed to take prednisone. (It gives me a rash). But the hydroxyzine made the itching more intense so I stopped taking that. And I'm being bad. Bill had some low-dose prednisone left that I kept and I've been taking 1 a day along with Benadryl every 4-6 hours. If I could still get Zantac I would take that too. That combination works wonders on hives. It is a little better this morning so maybe I'm getting a handle on it.

Bill has spent the last couple of days back at the crematory. To switch urns, it has to be done there as the urns have to be sealed. She also picked up the little bag of fine ash to put into my bracelet. She thought she would be able to get them back to me yesterday, but didn't. I told Kiyann he was having a sleep-over!

I need to go through my jewelry today and see if I have a plain gold chain that I can put his wedding bands on. I've had them on my key chain and I'm afraid they're going to get beat up or come off and get lost. So, that's on my list of things to do now too. Like I said, it just keeps getting longer and longer.

That's it, I think. The memorial service has been set and some family members are opting to wait to come until the graveside service. They are thinking that it is the actual funeral since it will have the military rites with it. And that's OK for them to think of it like that. There still isn't any time for it set yet, as they are still closed.

I hope everyone has a happy and safe holiday. Celebrate this great country of ours, with all of it's ugly past, along with the good. I still wouldn't want to live anywhere else!