Yesterday was almost anticlimactic! You know, the hour plus drive I have to get to the hospital is a good time to think, to rehearse in my head and sometimes out loud what I want to say and to pray. I think I did all of those yesterday. And when the time came, nary a harsh word was spoken!

Bill was awake watching TV when I got there. He said he only had a so-so night but he looked rested. When his nurse Nick came to do meds, I asked him to go ahead and get him a Xanax and he did that immediately with no questions asked.

When I saw Stephanie at the door getting her gown on, I took a deep breath and just asked God to get me through it with the right words and attitude. She walked to the side of his bed, looked at the vent numbers and smiled and then told Bill that she was proud of him for doing exactly what she had asked him to do, slow his breathing down. Before I could say anything she said that her plan was to put him on trach collar Monday and get rid of the vent. I told her that if I was there I could talk him through it and if he needed to go back to CPAP at night, that was fine with me. She said she didn't think he would have to. I then asked if the Xanax could be changed to scheduled from as needed so that he would have it in his system and stay calmer all the time. She looked at her notes and said that could be done.  She said she disagreed with Dr. Henderson about moving to another facility, mainly because there are very few in this area. I told her I had seen one in Jonesboro, but couldn't remember the name of it. But she said, he wouldn't need it, he would walk out of there! I don't think that will happen unless therapy gets really aggressive, but she said she wanted to see him walk like she did the first time she saw him in the office! I told her I wasn't opposed to skilled nursing like last time, but she was very positive that he wouldn't need it. Unfortunately, she hasn't watched the therapy he's been getting. So, a compromise was reached without me opening my mouth! Thank you Lord!

I can't do anything about more aggressive therapy until tomorrow at the earliest since they don't do therapy on week-ends. But, I did insist that he get into his chair. He wasn't too happy about it, but was fine once he was there. I even asked if he wanted to go back to bed when I left and he said no, he was fine where he was and wanted to keep sitting up. Now, that's my Bill, who has never liked laying in bed (maybe because we don't have a TV in the bedroom, and won't).

Cindy from cardiology asked if anything had been said yet about a home vent, and nothing has, but I have researched it. There is a device out that can be non-invasive and works more like a CPAP or BIPAP machine, or it can be invasive (connected to a trach) and works more like a vent in SIMV mode. Our oxygen supplier had mentioned it a while back and I wouldn't be surprised if we needed to go that route. Just another piece of equipment for our inventory.

He was fine that I had to leave early but Ryan called and said that Sweetie (that's what they call the guy) had just called and wasn't going to be able to make it after all. Now, I had a dilemma. I decided that since I was tired from not sleeping much the night before, I was going to come home anyway. I could use a few extra hours to myself. I will just tell Bill that they called when I was on my way home and told me. So, I got a little laundry done, I should have stopped at Walmart and got a few things, but I didn't want to be in the crowds. I got a tax return fixed and sent and started working on the last one I have to do so far. I didn't even turn the TV on. I had planned to listen to the Cubs game since I couldn't watch it here until 11 pm and that's way to late for me. Just a nice quiet afternoon and evening.

I still didn't sleep real well and woke up with leg cramps again in my right calf. Even though I take Potassium, it's running low still. Dr. Morrow, the cardiologist, thinks it's probably from the diuretic in my blood pressure pill. I still don't have the results of the labs she did Wednesday, but I also haven't looked on the websit to see if they are posted. So, I'll pick up a banana at the hospital when I get there and no, that won't be all I have for breakfast!

Today is Bill's 77th birthday! Another birthday that many people didn't think he would see. Of course it has to be very quiet because he can't have any cake or ice cream. But, he's going to get some phone calls, I'll just hold the phone to his ear. Everyone who will call knows he can only listen. I'll watch his lips to see what he's trying to say, because he will try to talk to them and relay messages. We'll have a bigger celebration when he's off the vent and can talk.

So, that's the day one of my new strategy went. The rest has to wait until at least tomorrow since none of management works on week-ends, along with therapy. So, it ain't over till it's over, or the fat lady sings, and I've been warming up my vocal chords! I'll keep you posted!