I got to the hospital about 10 yesterday morning, which wasn't bad since I took the cats first. And he did keep them. Cat was running a 102 fever and Mouse didn't flinch when he reached into his carrier to listen to him. So, they are also in the hospital! 

Bill was awake but had had a bowel movement so was uncomfortable. Tyler, his nurse, was just waiting for Eunice the PCA to come in to get him cleaned up. His numbers were only OK and when Eunice took his temperature, it was 100. I thought he had felt warm and he just looked like he didn't feel good.

I missed Dr. Threlkeld, or whoever was covering for him. I think it was Dr. Nowak because she called for Tyler while she was in the room. Hopefully they will come up with an antibiotic for him. The stuff in the collection jar looks really nasty and they were having to do a lot of suctioning again.

I also missed Dr. Morris, or Dr. Baymeadow who covers for him. His urine had started to clear after I left on Friday afternoon according to Tyler and it was still clear. It was pretty concentrated, but not pink. 

Dr. Schriner was the pulmonologist on call and after a week of pulmonology just looking at the vent settings and nodding or saying we'll just stay the course, he wanted him challenged a little. He put the vent on SIMV with pressure support. This setting would give him 12 breaths a minute and any other breaths he took, he would have taken on his own. The pressure support was like CPAP, keeping his airway open. At first Bill said it hurt his throat and that was from the increased pressure. He did have a hard time at first and started to go into panic mode. But Tyler and Kerry, the respiratory tech, decided to bump his oxygen up to 50% and that helped. Kerry said the doctor told him to leave him this way unless he became lethargic from retaining CO2 or got into distress. After the O2 change, he settled in and his numbers went into the mid 90s and his heart rate came down. We watched TV, Live PD this time, and he took a nap and we had a quiet afternoon.

Dr. Edwards came in and listened and I told him about the change in the vent. He looked at Bill's sats and they were at 96 so he turned the O2 back down to 40%. Then he asked if he could talk to me in the hallway. My thought was he was going to tell me about needing to move him from ICU. But, I was wrong! He said that he and pulmonary were on the same page that Bill is not a candidate to go home on a vent, and I agreed. He also said that if he was sent to Restorative Care, he didn't think he would do well there either. I told him there was talk of transfer and I was having trouble getting the Medicaid approval. He told me not to worry about that, he would continue treating him in ICU! His concern was if Bill would want to continue in the condition he's in. I told him that I ask him frequently if he wants to keep going, or if he wants to stop (and I asked him after talking to Dr. Edwards) he the answer so far has always been yes, he wants to continue. Dr. Edwards was OK with that. I told him I've known for a long time that he wasn't coming home, which I think reassured him somewhat that we were waiting for a magic bullet and tomorrow he would walk out of the hospital whole again. So, now it's kind of back to which doctor was pushing for transfer. I think it was probably the lung guys and Edwards can override that. Hearing that he would continue to treat Bill where he is and not to worry about the Medicaid, was like having a huge weight lifted! I didn't wake up in the night thinking about what I needed to do and who to call and where to go. I also thought, and wrote in my notes, I've been praying for guidance on this and yes, it was totally different than what I thought it would be, but God gave me an answer! Just shows never underestimate what God can, and will do, even with the "little" things!

I did also ask him about the cellcept and he's not going to restart it. He said that he's far enough out from transplant now that rejection is not really an issue anymore. He's still getting the Prograf to keep his immune system suppressed some, but he said with all of Bill's different infections, he's got to have some kind of immune system to help fight them. He also talked like this is not uncommon, and perhaps if we had been able to go to his last 2 May appointments, this would have been the case with them too. It makes sense, I just needed it explained. And, if he starts to reject the heart, it's just another condition to deal with along with the rest of them.

In the time I was in the hall talking to Dr. Edwards, Bill's sats dropped to 88/89 from the 95/96 they had been. Tyler came in for his 4 pm meds and I told her what Dr. Edwards had done and she said that Bill had been doing really good for 2 hours, so we compromised and put his oxygen at 45%. His numbers went back up almost immediately!

That's about it. It felt really strange coming home. Even though I'm the only human here, the cats were always here to greet me, with Cat telling me that I was gone too long and it was time for dinner, and that Mouse had been a bad kitty. But, yesterday it was just silence. And it was like that all evening, no cat on my lap or at the backdoor smoozing with the others, or jumping on the bed in the night or walking through the house talking. And the same this morning, sleeping until the alarm went off, not a hungry kitty walking up and down my body. I really miss the little critters!

So, that's it. I think I got everything covered. I have to start a new notebook today for my daily notes. So far this hospitalization has used 1 1/2 small notebooks. I also need to take another pen with me as the ink is getting pretty faint from the one I'm using. Someday I'll type all of the notes up so have a better record, in addition to this blog.

I hope all of you mothers out there have a Happy Mother's Day today, and that includes all of the dads that also fill that role, and grandparents who do the same. I'm sure I'll talk to my mom at some point today.